Excuse me? No, excuse YOU!

So here’s something that annoys me and I thought I’d write something about it to see if this is widely shared, or if I’m just easily annoyed.

Let me set the scene – 2 people are in a hallway talking to each other. Each one is on an opposite wall of the hallway, so between them they are taking up the entire hallway, forcing people to walk between them in order to walk down the hall. Now this, in and of itself, I don’t necessarily have a problem with. It’s annoying yes, but there have been times that I have done this. And of course anything that I have ever done could not POSSIBLY be annoying.

No, what I find incredibly annoying is the fact that it appears to be socially acceptable and mandated that the person who is just walking down the hall, minding his or her own business, is “supposed to” say “Excuse me”. Why should THEY have to beg the pah-don of the blowhards that are taking up the entire hallway?

So I was trying to think of a way that we can discourage this behavior. I already walk right through them without excusing myself. Even if there’s a tiny amount of room on one side of one person, I just barge right down the middle – your rude behavior is not making me have to try and squeeze myself through the very edge of the hallway. I thought maybe a dirty look, but that seems like it’s not quite enough. Another thought I had was to “accidentally” throw a shoulder into one of the participants, but that seems to go too far the other way.

So the solution I have come up with (and I think it’s a good one) is that the new socially accepted rule is that as you walk through the rudyheads, you say “Excuse you”. It’s just subtle enough, and because it’s so close to what people will be expecting to hear (“Excuse me”), you could probably even get away with it. They’d be left thinking (if they even hear it) something along the lines of “Did I just hear that right? Nahh”

So what do you think, loyal reader(s)? Shall we do it? Let’s take back the world, one hallway interaction at a time!!!