Meijer Box Tops deal report

Okay so Meijer had a promotion this week where if you bought 10 participating products, you got a custom coupon for 70 box tops for education. Each BTFE has a face value of 10 cents, and you can turn them into your kid’s school, or, in my case, sell them on eBay.

This is actually somewhat stingier than similar deals that they have had in the past (the best was one where you got 100 BTFE for buying 12 products, and it was on the same week as super double coupons!)

As is usually the case with deals like this, with coupons it’s fairly straight forward to buy the 10 products for less than the $7 face value of the coupon, making it a moneymaker.

My report:

40 Chex Mix
24 Bisquick 40 oz
20 things that I can’t tell Carolyn about
38 Jars of frosting
20 Muffin mix
13 Hamburger Helper
4 Boxed potatoes
1 Cheerios Snack mix

I paid a total of $87.08 and if you add that all up, you’ll see that is 160 products, or 16 coupons worth. So they have a face value of $112, but I think I can eBay them for a net profit (after ebay and paypal fees) of $8 each at least, which would make them $128. So a net profit overall of about $40 or more (plus all that food).

As an added bonus, that $87 came out of the “Dan” envelope because I’m treating it as an investment in selling the box tops, so the total weekly grocery bill was only $53.

The mechanics of being the best man at your best friend’s brother’s wedding

So while working late at night I get an email that says, in its entirety:

Why didn’t Larry ask Harry to be his best man?  I mean, they’re brothers!

And doesn’t Larry have a best friend of his own?  I mean you’re not even Larry’s best friend; you’re Harry’s best friend!

In what world would you be your best friend’s brother’s best man?

I had no idea what he was talking about and wondered if my 2:20 a.m brain could possibly handle this. But after a bit of conversation, my friend Jim and I sat down to discuss what scenario would cause Larry, the brother of your best friend (Harry) to ask you to be his best man. Not to mention only giving 5 days notice. We both agreed that it would seem to be customary that you would know far in advance of 5 days who would be the best man at your wedding.

At first I suggested that perhaps Harry had either died or fallen into a coma and was therefore unable to attend the wedding. Harry was originally intended to be the best man, but due to this tragic accident was unable to, and that explains why you were called on such short notice. Possibly Harry fell into a coma – had a bad bout with a malignant carcinoma.

But in the end, it seemed to all fall into place that you are in fact the future Mrs. Larry’s close friend. Possibly even her BEST friend (in the sense that she has no better friends), even though you of course have a best friend in Harry. There was a history between you two, perhaps some sexual tension, but in the end, things did not work out for whatever reason.

You’re truly happy for Larry and his new wife, but this history still causes you to lament as she walks down the aisle that there goes, in fact, one more girl that you won’t be gettin. Nothing serious – just a moment’s hesitation for some reflection. That also would explain why afterwards you began blinkin (back tears). Certainly your sweet and tender reaction does not hurt your chances with any bridesmaids, stacked or not. By the reception though – you’re over the tears. You wish Larry and his new wife well, and since the reception is so pumpin with the base so thumpin, and a bridesmaid so ready willing and able to dance to a different groove – things are going much better.

It also explains why there might be a need for a libido check. You want to ensure not only that things are all in working order, but also somewhat of a systems check – can I really face Mrs. Larry as she gets married, etc.

PS – If you managed to read this whole post and have no idea what I’m talking about, you might want to watch this video (especially from 3:15-3:50) (possibly NSFW) and/or read the last paragraph here. Then come back and re-read this blog – I promise it will seem much funnier